Lejla Alijevic
04/27/2021
Prof. Weaver
English 1102 Section 400
Research Paper
Do children prefer to stay in contact with their parents when they start off to college?
For 12 years, kids go to elementary, middle, and high school looking forward to their high school graduation. High school graduation is an important event for kids to take the next step in their career. It is the purpose to see or figure out what is their academic self. For 12 years, kids live with their parents with their caring, support, and advice. After high school graduation, it is common for kids to go live in a dorm but do parents still stay in touch? Do children still need the caring, support, and advice after moving out of their houses?
In their article, “Staying Involved in Your Teen’s Life Without Becoming a Helicopter Parent” in Children’s Hospital of Richmond at VCU (2018), Leslie A. Kimball, shared how parents feel, “As parents, we love and worry about our children from the moment they’re born. As they grow into adolescence, their academic and social lives become more complicated and competitive” (1). Students are needed to have parents in their life but not as a helicopter parent as Kimball is trying to explain in her article. Parents need to prepare their children for the future by being present, not overbearing or intrusive. It is their responsibility to let their children have failure and use it as a lesson. You want to let them figure out how to get back up.
When it comes to starting in college, kids are excited to live in the dorm without hearing their parents giving them chores and others that can be listed. There are multiple things that they are looking forward to, considering they want their freedom. Sometimes they do not understand the importance and reality in their term of “freedom”. If an issue involves immediate safety concerns, it is a suggestion for parents to step in. Kimbell in fact shared tips for parents that were given to keep support and allow children also to keep each other in touch. The tips are, “Focus on relationships, identify and highlight strengths, address skill deficits, set realistic expectations, and listen and be curious” (Kimbell, 1).
Helicopter parents in my term mean parents being overprotective and not finding the right balance to encourage in their children’s lives. It denies children of developing critical thinking skills, resiliency, and stress management. Parents have a huge impact on their children’s lives from early adolescence well into adulthood. If parents are overly involved in their child’s life, it can have the opposite effect and harm them in the end. It is not what children would look forward to after high school. Parental involvement is necessary for a child’s life, but helicopter parenting is ultimately harmful because of the controlling style that can damage the relationship.
Written by Chloe Bennett, “What Is Helicopter Parenting and Why Is It Bad?” in News Medical Life Sciences (2018), reported “College students who reported that their parents were actively involved in their school work, or created very structured environments during their youth, were more likely to have depression and anxiety as an adult, and were less perseverant” (1). Her main point offers the reader to understand the reality that being a helicopter parent varies differently depending on one’s social status. It is very common for college students to suffer from depression and anxiety. This shows how it is important for both children and parents to understand on how to make a difference in the issues and be supportive in the future or now. It is never too late to feel connected with your children to keep in contact as a friend under the title of a mom or dad.
In my belief with research, children want to have their parents keep in contact after high school when they do not know it. At the same time, they can make their decision on whether to keep in touch or not depending on what role their parents decide to take. “Helicopter parenting can influence not only the psychological well-being of children, but also their social behavior” (Bennett,1). Our overall goal is to improve students’ academic success. It is the purpose to encourage children to explore careers that will best suit his or her interests and strengths. Children want a positive energy from their parents. It is a feeling they desire the most, for parents to believe in their children without being a pushy and overwhelming parent. If you are reading this paper and is a student, would you like to stay in contact with your parents after high school dealing with your academic? For you to think about the pros and cons and list base of what this paper shared. It is to see what role your parents have been throughout the whole 12 years in your life. “It is not what you do for your children, but what you have taught them to do for themselves, that will make them successful human beings” was said by Ann Landers.
Sources:
Bennett, Chloe. “What Is Helicopter Parenting and Why Is It Bad?” News Medical Life Sciences, 23 Aug. 2018, www.news- medical.net/health/What-is-Helicopter-Parenting-and-Why-is-it-Bad.aspx.
Kimball, Leslie A. “Staying Involved in Your Teen’s Life without Becoming a Helicopter Parent.” Children’s Hospital of Richmond at VCU, 7 Dec. 2018, www.chrichmond.org/blog/Staying-involved-in-your-teens-life-without-becoming-a-helicopter-parent.