Lejla Alijevics’s Research Paper

Lejla Alijevic

04/27/2021

Prof. Weaver

English 1102 Section 400

Research Paper

Do children prefer to stay in contact with their parents when they start off to college?

 

For 12 years, kids go to elementary, middle, and high school looking forward to their high school graduation. High school graduation is an important event for kids to take the next step in their career. It is the purpose to see or figure out what is their academic self. For 12 years, kids live with their parents with their caring, support, and advice. After high school graduation, it is common for kids to go live in a dorm but do parents still stay in touch? Do children still need the caring, support, and advice after moving out of their houses?

In their article, “Staying Involved in Your Teen’s Life Without Becoming a Helicopter Parent” in Children’s Hospital of Richmond at VCU (2018), Leslie A. Kimball, shared how parents feel, “As parents, we love and worry about our children from the moment they’re born. As they grow into adolescence, their academic and social lives become more complicated and competitive” (1). Students are needed to have parents in their life but not as a helicopter parent as Kimball is trying to explain in her article. Parents need to prepare their children for the future by being present, not overbearing or intrusive. It is their responsibility to let their children have failure and use it as a lesson. You want to let them figure out how to get back up.

When it comes to starting in college, kids are excited to live in the dorm without hearing their parents giving them chores and others that can be listed. There are multiple things that they are looking forward to, considering they want their freedom. Sometimes they do not understand the importance and reality in their term of “freedom”. If an issue involves immediate safety concerns, it is a suggestion for parents to step in. Kimbell in fact shared tips for parents that were given to keep support and allow children also to keep each other in touch. The tips are, “Focus on relationships, identify and highlight strengths, address skill deficits, set realistic expectations, and listen and be curious” (Kimbell, 1).

Helicopter parents in my term mean parents being overprotective and not finding the right balance to encourage in their children’s lives. It denies children of developing critical thinking skills, resiliency, and stress management. Parents have a huge impact on their children’s lives from early adolescence well into adulthood. If parents are overly involved in their child’s life, it can have the opposite effect and harm them in the end. It is not what children would look forward to after high school. Parental involvement is necessary for a child’s life, but helicopter parenting is ultimately harmful because of the controlling style that can damage the relationship.

Written by Chloe Bennett, “What Is Helicopter Parenting and Why Is It Bad?” in News Medical Life Sciences (2018), reported “College students who reported that their parents were actively involved in their school work, or created very structured environments during their youth, were more likely to have depression and anxiety as an adult, and were less perseverant” (1). Her main point offers the reader to understand the reality that being a helicopter parent varies differently depending on one’s social status. It is very common for college students to suffer from depression and anxiety. This shows how it is important for both children and parents to understand on how to make a difference in the issues and be supportive in the future or now. It is never too late to feel connected with your children to keep in contact as a friend under the title of a mom or dad.

In my belief with research, children want to have their parents keep in contact after high school when they do not know it. At the same time, they can make their decision on whether to keep in touch or not depending on what role their parents decide to take. “Helicopter parenting can influence not only the psychological well-being of children, but also their social behavior” (Bennett,1). Our overall goal is to improve students’ academic success. It is the purpose to encourage children to explore careers that will best suit his or her interests and strengths. Children want a positive energy from their parents. It is a feeling they desire the most, for parents to believe in their children without being a pushy and overwhelming parent. If you are reading this paper and is a student, would you like to stay in contact with your parents after high school dealing with your academic? For you to think about the pros and cons and list base of what this paper shared. It is to see what role your parents have been throughout the whole 12 years in your life. “It is not what you do for your children, but what you have taught them to do for themselves, that will make them successful human beings” was said by Ann Landers.

 

Sources:

Bennett, Chloe. “What Is Helicopter Parenting and Why Is It Bad?” News Medical Life Sciences, 23 Aug. 2018, www.news-  medical.net/health/What-is-Helicopter-Parenting-and-Why-is-it-Bad.aspx. 

Kimball, Leslie A. “Staying Involved in Your Teen’s Life without Becoming a Helicopter Parent.” Children’s Hospital of Richmond at VCU, 7 Dec. 2018, www.chrichmond.org/blog/Staying-involved-in-your-teens-life-without-becoming-a-helicopter-parent.

 

Emily Bergeon’s Academic Profile

This piece was managed through text messages about Emily Bergeon’s academic self. Though out the whole process of asking questions and getting to know each other, she shared her plans, interests, and opinions. Emily is 18 years old, currently a senior dual enrollment student at GSU. She has been in Georgia throughout her whole life and attended Findley Oaks Elementary, Taylor Road Middle School, and is currently in Chattahoochee High School. She is working fully online with 3 classes in high school and the rest in college. Her plan is not 100% assured at this moment, but when she graduates this semester of 2021, she has two options between two colleges. One is the University of Georgia, her dream school, and the second is Mercer University. If the plan is towards Mercer University, as I was told she will perhaps transfer after a year or so to UGA. Once she gets started in college to complete a bachelor’s degree, her intention is to have a major in psychology or something related to medical and a minor in business.  After undergrad, she is looking forward to entering nursing school and received her master’s. Fun fact about Emily, her favorite show is Grey’s Anatomy.

Organization, procrastinator, and passion are 3 powerful academic words that Emily sees in herself. She is exceptional at keeping things in order and not losing things. As she replies, “even though procrastinating is not necessarily healthy” but everything she does, it works for her. She is not the only one and it is common that most students are procrastinators. Everything she does in life; she goes after it. She is so passionate that she cares for it and would never give up until she achieves it. In fact, her mom is her biggest influence. She is proud to share why, “My mom has shown me to never give up and always chase after my dream. She has made me know what it means to be a strong independent person and how I don’t need to depend on someone else.”

As Emily is succeeding her goals, I asked her, “Which do you prefer, in-person or online or both?” After our discussion, the decision was made to like online better than in-person. Being online lets her be more productive. She feels energetic when she can wake up and go to the gym. Instead of coming home after in-person school and felt like it was a waste of time where online is more flexible that she has more time to complete assignments.  She has the ability to multiple task at home and is thankful to make her own schedule. She is looking forward and ready to hop on being in-person for college next year because she feels like it would be a different experience as a full-time college student. As soon to be a full-time college student, she finds Taking My Parents to College by Jennine Capó Crucet very fascinating. Her thoughts, “I have never really thought about it because for as long as I remember, my family has always been to college. I never thought about being the first generation or know much about it because it is such a norm in my family.”

Emily will be the next family in her tree generation to go to college. She is more than just being an organization, procrastinator, and passion; she is a hard worker and independent woman. She is balancing her life by studying in high school and college classes while working nonstop at Chick-fil-a as a manager. Imagine her stress she must have gone through, but she believes in herself. She is ready to take the next level to college and see her steps. Congratulations to Emily soon to be a graduated 2021 during the Covid-19 pandemic.