Mrs. Perfection or The Functional Alcoholic?

Stigmas incorporate negative views towards an individual or a group of people. The stigmatizing attitudes towards individuals with substance abuse, which is strongly associated with other mental illnesses, can affect individuals to feel isolated, rejected, and experience levels of discrimination.

Society has a negative stigma about individuals who are battling and struggling with alcohol abuse. There are strong opinions of what is deemed socially acceptable among men and women when it comes to alcohol. Historically, alcohol use has been more evident among men; however, alcohol consumption levels are similar between men and women over the past decade. Women are consuming higher levels of alcohol than ever, which reflects the shift in the gender roles of women in our society.

In the past, women took on traditional gender roles of taking care of their house, family, and children.  Women of today are becoming go-getters, having economic independence, mothers, wives, and are taking up spaces in dominating male career fields. Women who take on some of these roles may engage in excessive or binge drinking, traditionally was viewed as “masculine” activities. Regardless of the shift of gender roles, drinking excessive amounts of alcohol has adverse health effects, which is now affecting many women today.

circa 1960: An American housewife demonstrates the cleaning power of ‘Vel’ detergent for a T.V. advert. (Photo by Hulton Archive/Getty Images)

In 2018, the National Survey on Drug Use and Health estimated 5.3 million adult women from the ages of 18 and older had an Alcohol Use Disorder (AUD) [4]. Many women are managing their lives and not fully acknowledging the fact they may have a drinking problem. Many of these women want to reject the narrative of being labeled as an alcoholic. Women who are labeled as alcoholics are viewed as sloppy, “loose”, having slurring of speech, difficulties holding down a job, consistently hungover, and their personal relationships are dysfunctional.

According to the American Psychiatric Association, individuals who do not fall into this mold of the “typical alcoholic” are known as high-functioning alcoholics. The high functioning alcoholic may appear to be a successful woman who can juggle her work and family life with ease. This woman is displaying an image of perfectionism and does not show she is physically or emotionally dependent on alcohol, but still, she may have difficulty resisting alcohol [1,3]. The successful woman or “Miss Has it All Together” comes in many different forms. She may not fit the generic alcoholic stereotype, yet this does not remove the fact she may be suffering from alcohol addiction[1,3]. Women will live in denial until their health starts to decline, facing issues at work, broken relationships, being emotionally drained, or other life events that will allow them to realize the extent of their drinking problem.  

Like many women who are denial of their drinking problem, I wanted to share a story of a woman named Jean, who appears to be the “successful woman” but is a recovering alcoholic [5].  

“I am one of the fortunate alcoholics who has lived to tell my story. But for the grace of God and the program of A.A., I would have died.

At that time, my drinking was fairly well under control; I was young, I had the stamina to get drunk every night and work every day, and the vicious cycle went on and on. I was married several times, held very prestigious jobs, i.e., working in various law firms, for a state Senator and a Probate Judge and the Lt. Governor’s office. I had a beautiful home and a husband who I thought I loved at the time; and most of all, my beautiful children.

Well, this husband didn’t love me as much as I thought; he did the right thing; he took my children, he booted me out of my beautiful home, and he divorced me because of my drinking problem.

I tried to blame everyone and everything I knew for my drinking, the death of my child, the ex-husbands, etc. Everyone was responsible for my drinking except me. The blackouts were, in a way, a blessing. I don’t want to remember some of those times…..None of my family would allow me in their homes; this was bottom out time. I looked in the yellow pages of the phone book and found the number for A.A.”

You can read more of her story through this link.

Women who are functional alcoholics like Jean are in denial and attempt to hide their drinking problem from others. It is essential just like Jean’s family to be aware if you have a loved one, family member, or friend who may have a drinking problem. That person may need an intervention to fully understand that they are putting themselves at risk health-wise and how it is affecting other areas of their personal lives. Women who struggle with alcohol abuse, hesitate to seek help because they do not want the label of an alcoholic and fear judgment from family and friends.   

 We need to change the narrative and stigma of alcoholism, for many women are suffering in silence. Women are drinking excessively because of many reasons, but alcoholic beverages are easily accessible, which is a problem. The government needs to create policies relating to pricing and taxes of alcohol, retail access, and reducing exposure to alcohol advertisements. These steps are necessary to minimize alcohol consumption and alcohol-related harm among women[2]. 

Also, early intervention is critical to reassure that long term effects of alcohol do not take full effect. Women who may not know where to get help can first seek advice from family, friends, and even your local doctor’s office. Doctors can perform different tests to see if you are showing any signs of chronic diseases or conditions caused by excessive drinking. Doctors can also speak with you on how to quit drinking or lessen the problem. Women who are experiencing alcohol abuse need a support system such as family, friends, school counseling, therapy, or outpatient treatment plans, which will aid in their recovery and healing. There are available resources and call a national helpline from the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Service Administration. The SAMHSA can help provide and locate services for individuals who are facing alcohol use disorders [6].

The high functioning alcoholic may appear to have it all together, but drinking excessive alcohol over time can have adverse effects if not appropriately addressed. Making changes in government policies and seeking help through intervention programs or support from loved ones can promote positive health outcomes of women who are struggling with alcohol abuse.



  1. “What Is a Functional Alcoholic?” Dual Diagnosis,
  2. “Addressing Alcohol-Related Harms: A Population-Level Response.” AMERICAN PUBLIC HEALTH ASSOCIATION,
  3. “Intervention Strategies for a High-Functioning Alcoholic.” org,
  4. “Alcohol Facts and Statistics.” National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism, U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, 18 Feb. 2020,
  5. “Jean’s Alcoholic Story: I Tried to Blame Everyone and Everything.” Verywell Mind, Verywell Mind, 8 Apr. 2019,
  6. “National Helpline: SAMHSA – Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration.” gov,

Why Am I Drinking?

During this time of uncertainty, the CDC and the World Health Organization have advised us to practice social distancing and isolation to help flatten the curve of spreading Coronavirus. COVID-19, Coronavirus, or Corona, as other people would say, is here, and there is no telling when this pandemic will come to an end. As the stock markets continue to crash, filing of unemployment and mortality rates continue to rise, not finding a single roll of tissue and paper towel insight, and now on the news of murder hornets racing to the United States for the first time in history. It just appears as the world is going to end.

The world is at a standstill, and everyone around the globe is experiencing levels of uncertainty that leads many to feel bored, stressed, anxious, depressed, and lonely. Cooped up in the house all day long by yourself, significant other, children, or with family can cause someone to have these negative feelings. Since everything around us is going downhill, drinking a glass of wine or a bottle of beer seems right for the occasion.

Even though restaurants and bars are not currently open because of Coronavirus, that is not stopping anyone from buying and indulging in alcohol during this pandemic. The demand and consumption of alcohol have increased in sales over 50% since March this year in comparison to last year (Rebalancing the ‘COVID-19 Effect’ on Alcohol Sales 2020). The United States is allowing businesses to have carryout cocktails, home deliveries, and purchasing alcohol online, which is making it easier to stock up on alcohol in your pantry or fridge.

Now in this day and age, it is easier and faster to obtain alcoholic beverages than everyday essentials like toilet paper. Why are we rushing to grab a bottle of wine or order 24 packs of our favorite beer instead? The significant increase in alcohol sales during this period reflects how we may use alcohol as medicine to treat our stress and depression.  Women in comparison to men drink for different reasons. Women drink in response to negative emotions while men drink for positive reinforcement and pleasure (Alcohol and the Female Brain 2018). Women may drink alcohol to escape the harsh realities of the effects of Coronavirus. Women are feeling depressed and stressed about losing their job, surrounded by too many people or no one in their house or apartment, isolated with an abusive partner, or taking care of their children 24/7 during this stressful time.

 The effects of alcohol can change someone’s mood and behavior instantly. Drinking one to two drinks of alcohol can uplift your mood, feeling happier when everything around you seems to be falling apart. Drinking more than two drinks can make someone feel so relaxed, losing control of your movements to forgetting why you were sad or depressed in the first place (Lautieri,2020). The problem with indulging large volumes of alcohol alters your ability to think things thoroughly, especially when you have negative thoughts or feelings, which can lead to impaired memory, poor judgment, risky behavior, and becoming violent.  Drinking seems to be a quick fix to ease some of our problems, but we fail to realize the long term negative effects it can have on our bodies such as liver and brain damage, depression, cancer, and infertility.

Mental health and alcoholism are becoming severe public health issues during this pandemic. Ultimately, alcohol consumption is by choice, we have to take responsibility for our actions and how much we decide to consume throughout the day. We also need to ask ourselves, why did I choose to pick up this glass of wine or drink this can of beer? Am I drinking because of boredom? Or am I drinking because I want to escape reality or suppress negative thoughts?

Additionally, here is a video on Americans buying alcohol, alcohol sales, and health concerns on alcohol consumption during Covid-19.




1.“Alcohol and the Female Brain’ Presented by NIAAA Director Dr. George F. Koob.” National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism, U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, 10 Jan. 2018,

2. Lautieri, Amanda. “Alcohol Effect on Brain: Short & Long-Term Mental & Cognitive Effects.” 3 Feb. 2020. American Addiction Centers,

3.“Rebalancing the ‘COVID-19 Effect’ on Alcohol Sales.” Nielsen, 5 July, 2020,

4.“‘Wasp’ Memes & GIFs.” Imgflip,