November 17

dear journal: these words are my own


Dear Journal,

Not that I want you to become that stereotypical journal/diary/notebook filled with rants about love and how unfair it may be, buuuut it does bring around an interesting topic of debate. It digs deeper to partner expectations, gender roles, and heteronormativity.

Literally say “girls have higher expectations than boys” or vice versa in a room and BAM— A full-fledged verbal battle erupts. It has been a topic of debate for SO MANY years. It seems that there has always been societal expectations of what makes an attractive partner, well, “attractive.” I’m not saying that expectations are bad, but there are many that are unrealistic.

Of course, it’s nearly impossible to quantify who has higher standards. It is a little easier to approach this dilemia not by higher standards but by the breakdown of standards into different categories. Nowadays, it’s not all about the face. Personaility? Humor? Intelligence? Steady income? House? Car? Ability to cook? It’s all about having the full package, no matter if you are female or male.

Not too long ago though, it really was just about the face. Beauty was usually associated with popularity and wealth though, distracting us from focusing on the (more important, in my opinion) characteristics like personaility and intelligence.

For example, you’ve got the popular, fashionable, feminine queen bee (s/o to Regina George). On the other hand you have the practially unnoticed, athletic tom girl (aka my girl Sam Montgomery). By definition, which girl was more likely to be pursued? These concepts of the idealized “dream girl” conforming to one standard, whether that being the “queen bee” or “tom girl” persona, seem a little outdated according to today’s society.

Nowadays, we want a girl (or guy) that has the best of both worlds. Right, Miley/Hannah?



Until next time, sweet memes & sleep tight,